[from the diary of Anne Madison Willis Ambler]
Saturday July 12, 1862
As we were disappointed in not getting to Clifton
yesterday, F[annie] & I left Tom & walked on up this
morning,-Sis B and Mary walked to Dr. S[tribling]'s,--
News arrived that McClellan is evacuating
the Peninsula, --another account that he
is being reinforced=
I pray for patience, but I dont pray
with a believing spirit---The clouds gather
all around me,--Oh, God, deliver us from
the hands of our enemies-."
-----They speak of arming the negroes,-
I had an awful dream about that a few
nights ago which haunts me.-
I know that I wouldn't feel so if I could
only hear from you but "hope deferred maketh
the heart sick" & mine is sick, weary, wasting-
= Your last letter was dated 21st of May--
Since that, how much has happened,-I
feel as if I would never hear again,--so
long, so long, No one knows how wear
I am,--weary, weary, fearful, -I know
not what I fear,--
How happy we were together,--"will those
days ever come again? Never...never"
[transcription in 1972 by her granddaughter Anne Madison Wright Baylor]
MSS 15406
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