I have heard today of an underground
that goes tomorrow & tho I have little to say I will
not lay my head upon my pillow until I have
poured out some of the sadness of my heart to you
for only in deep sadness can I speak, write, or think.
Since the sad affair at Roanoke we have all been
deeply depressed but the news yesterday of the
surrender of Fort Donelson & 15000 including
Buckner Pillow & Sydney Johnson sent us weeping
to our beds. Southern people kept within doors
Many said the war was over & the Confederates
we feel that they struggled in vain & give up. this
of course we did not think--but the war wh a
week ago we all felt assured wd in the course
of a a few months result in the glorious independance[sic]
of the South, now loomed up hideously in the distance
thro a long vista of years. Yr Pa said "they will struggle
nobly, they will never give up to these Goths may
over-run the whole country they can never hold it."
I asked him if it was to be a long war, & this desperate
struggle for existence, "had we not better apply at once
to Genl. Dix for permission for the girls to return telling
him how they have been supporting themselves." Your
Pa said "I must confess if the war is to be prolonged I wd
rather get them home, but I'm afraid of this treason
bill until we see how they work it--then they have
recd. such kindness at the hands of the Confederate
Gov. that it might not do for them to withdraw abruptly
They we be the best judges of that & there it is but right
I sd tell you now--that I have made up my mind that if
[page 2]
it comes to a struggle, I am a son of Virginia & must
struggle with her, I could not stay here." Well I was
sad enough before & this was not calculated to
comfort me--I just felt as if to me, the end of
the world was come!-----This evening we are all
in better spirits; I hope the truth is braking thro
the Federal lies--there are flying rumours thro'
town that altho McClellan did announce in
the senate chamber the surrender of Fort D-
the capture of 15000 men & three gen. that
they only took 1500 & Genl. Buckner. There is
also a rumor 5hat Beauregard has surrounded
Grant! that is too good of course, but we
are not so down-hearted & take great comfort
that so far as we can learn they had not
heard this news in Norfolk & the associated
press comes out this eveng. & denies having
reported the capture of Savannan--I never
believed that. But after this unfortunate
Roanoke affair one cant feel the confidence
they did before. What miserable mismanage
=ment was there! 3000 men to surrender after
making so slight a resistance as to lose but
8 men--I dont understand it unless they had
no ammunition, & if so why did they attempt
to hold the Island? What in the world did
Genl. McCulloch stay so long in R___d for when
every thing in the West seems to be going
to pot--and what business had he & Price to
quarrel. they ought to leave that to the Fed
=erals--our cause is so sacred it sd bind certainly
all the higher officers together.
[page 3]
Your dear H.....was here tonight& informed me that
his is making every effort to get to R___d & I have very
little doubt that he will succeed. I hope he will!
He says he thinks I had better make arrangement for
"the young ladies" to return with him. I must know
their wish about it first & after that have Genl. Dix's
assurance of safety---our master is a gentleman
& seems disposed to act kindly towards us. I do
hope we've gotten yr trunk & box ere this! Will said
if I wd prove property I cd have it--I wrote to Capt
Talmage Q.M. of F Monroe who has charge
of them--he is an old friend of John I heard he
enclosed my letter in one from himself, & I wrote
at the same time to Mrs Huger asking her to get the Genl to
send over a requisition for them as I had asked Tal
=mage not to send them until he did as they might
otherwise again go over & return for want f an owner.
On Saturday last we recd a letter of a few lines from
Col. Pegram saying he had seen the young ladies in
R____d the day before, very well but Miss Hettie very
homesick (?) (could he have mistaken Jennie for you?)
but she had asked him to say in his note that she
wanted me to buy her something thin for the
summer--He seemed very hurried & I concluded that
he had just arrived in Norfolk to be sent down to
N. Carolina for when here he seemed so impatient to
get into active service. When I read the request
I cd not but exclaim at the little satisfaction
one felt in getting up a summer wardrobe
when she writes one was she lying at Fortress
Monroe. I never will send any thing again unless
[page 4]
under the care of some lady going--I have been
waiting to send a box by Kirby but he seems to
be lost in the fog as Minnie wd say & does not
return from W--& yr dear H. last night told me
not to put too much faith in him--I though tho'
he wd not be apt to wear yr dresses--still he might
not take the trouble to get them thro so I think
I will look up a lady--I'm told it will not be a
difficult matter as since Dix has the power there
is much less difficulty in procuring them--- if
I had only known this yesterday I wd have gone
to gt some of the ladies who are I hear to go
to the Fortress this Even: Among others I heard
of Mrs Hoffman & Dora but I am still
in hopes they have not gone yet & if not
I will go to see them & ask them to take
you down some light things & the three silks
I've altered for you--I think you had
better give one to Jennie I got you yesterday
4 lawn dresses 2 apiece--they are not expensive
ones but we all think them exceedingly pretty
I'm too poor to buy expensive things. I think
I must get Jennie a white barige[?] cloak for
I dont know what she can wear when it is too
warm for her cloth & it gets warm in R______d
so soon. You see I am writing as if you were cer
=tainly going to remain where you are. This is
the 19th & I heard yesterday that the Southern Confed
=eracy was preparing for a 10 years war--long
before that time expires this Yankee Gov:t will
be so deeply in debt that it will take a wise man
to calculate the interest there[?] Still it is a per
[page 5]
fectly tyrannical irresponsible Govt & they will
not hesitate to do any thing to carry on the war
& unless Eng. & France interpose & raise the
blockade I see no end the the[sic] struggle--then
in view of this I
of such a seperation[sic] from my beloved children.
We know better than we do for we are kept
in as profound ignorance as our masters
can desire; yesterday the editors of the South
were placed in Fort McHenry because they
editorially remarked the day before "The sur
render of Fort D & 15000 men that we can
=not give it entire credence even tho it has
been announced by Genl. McClellan." I heard
today that the Republican was stopped Y the
"New Street" might as well be the New York
Herald for its afraid to chirp. We are looking
with intense anxiety for the next news from
Engd- the minority seems opposed to us, but
parliament may not be & thro' private
letters we hear that the people are eager
for the recognition. What did you think of
the insolent manner in wh those wretches
in Congress rec:d the news that Floyd had
run from Fort D--They never run!
Was there ever such weather!! It is raining
now as if it had not rained for a year--& it
does nothing else. If it is good for the Confeds
I'm satisfied, but I'm all the time thinking of
my poor boys in camp. God bless them! Some
=times I have no hope that I shall ever see
them again--they are never absent from
my thoughts Oh how I do long to have them
once more in their own dear home but
having once tried their wings I fear they will
never want to return to the parent nest
[page 6]
I leave it to you about coming home my dear
children--if thing look brighter & you can
spend a pleasant spring in Richmond
why stay for you certainly we find it far other
=wise here. but if any danger is apprehended
of a successful movement upon Norfolk
or R____d do not think for a moment of re
=maining--I think I sd lose my senses at
the thought of you being in Va without a
protector if our beloved army was forced to
fall back. Oh God forbid that. But we
do not know['] one moment I am hopeful &
then I read some of these vile papers & I'm
in despair. Oh England! England! How cruel
has her policy been towards us! if I had not
been for her interference France we have
acknowledged us. Is'nt too cold blooded, the
way that she is drawing off? If she continues
true to this rotten Gov:t at Washington I hope
her people may rise in every manufacturing
district & force her to consider their starving
condition. the town was quite in an uproar
yesterday the roughs rushing about to force
people to hang out Union flags--But genl.
Dix soon caused them to "tut their taps" as Nellie
elegantly expresses it when she commands silence.
I sd think by the middle of May you wd like to come
home under any circumstances & if you fix some
point of time you might withdraw from your
Govt work gracefully & gratefully. But be
=fore you do come I must know of it so
that I can make application to Dix
& recd his assurance of probation
[page 7]
for you. All this you cd fully arrange with
me thro yr dear Henry sd he go far I despair
of ever getting any more letters, they all
go to the Govt--never a line recd from the
dear boys ever. I wish they had all been
written on stiff foolscap & were crammed
down Sewards throat! Do you get my letters?
I was so glad to hear that Willie Carr had
got a situation in R____d tell him I recd
his along with one to Frisby & we will both
write to him soon--tell him Sue & I
have become intimate bosom friends
interchange visits walk down street to
=gether & go shopping in company.
I hope you'll write as soon as you get
yr trunk. Oh how I pine for a good
long letter, but I no longer expect one.
Yr Pa said last night "Oh how delightful
it wd be to have the girls home!"
The school is a dreadful drag! I'm heart
sick of it--its not what it used to be--& I think
the girls feel it very sensibly, I know I do. Very
few of them seem to feel any interest in
their studies & I do not think either Annie
or Maria know how to interest them--
Maria is sweet, sensible & dignified but
too quiet & inanimate--I am not disciplina-
=rian enough--I've a stupid 1st class & alto
=gether I'm disgusted. A girl at my right hand
generally talking about Ingleside & its perfec
=tions to wh no other school cd compare-&
[page 8]
Bettie at my left, gabble--gabble--gable
& if I were to knock her down with a
sledge-hammer she wd not or cd not stop
Eva Thoale near by not fat behind her
without her smartness They all
send oceans of love to you & dear Jennie.
Tell Jennie I see a great deal of the
Winns--Agnes has been staying
for the last month & they come here
& I go there--I've got quite intimate
with the old gentleman--if it had
not rained this eveng I sd have
gone down to tea. All are
well I've no more time
Yr Aunt Ellen is coming on
in July to spend the summer.
Love to all around you; my
own darling precious children
take care of yrselves. take care
of yrselves[sic]--
says "Miss Hettie is very homesick
but prudent." What does he
mean? Did you tell him to tell me
that to relieve my many anxieties.
Write to the dear boys so far away
there & so cheerless--Oh my children.
Will god in His goodness ever again
give you to me under my own rooftree?
There the bell rings I expect for my letter--
No -- it is Frisby H--he has just sent me up a
letter for W--& he told me the other day he sd write
it. goodbye again my own precious ones--yr devoted Ma.
[Mrs. Wilson B. Cary]
Hettie and her sister Jennie had smuggled drugs and clothing through the Union blockade, across the Potomac for Confederate troops and were subsequently forced to leave Baltimore. The two remained in Richmond for the remainder of the war and Hettie eventually married Pegram.
MSS 1415
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