1861 December 11

[from the diary of Z. Lee Gilmer, Sgt., Co. B, 19th Virginia (Albemarle Rifles)

This morning
although it bids
fare to be a bad day a Had
Wm H Shepherd of
Nelson Co Va who is
one of my tent mates
got a pass from our
Capt countersigned
by Maj H Gant Comm
anding to visit the
Battlefield of Bulls
Run, we put up a
piece of bread & Turkey
& put set out for the tramp
we met with no obstruc
tion until we got to Cub
Run bridge on the
Warrenton Pike
where we found a
picket & would not
let us pass without
the Generals signa-
ture so we returned
across the Bridge &
turned down the
run & crossed a few
100 yards below, then
went on without
any impediment
but we avoided the Pike.
We first visited Lewis's
ford (where my Regmt was on the
day of battle) & the woods
where Capt Latham fired
into with his canon, the
trees were much torn by
ball, shot & shell, his
fires were very effectu
al. I had to wade the ford
to get to our fortificationos
the water came over the
top of my boots, our posi
tion is the best on the
run, & could have held
it against all odds
Lathoms[sic] Battery sup
ported us. This ford is
about a 1/2 mile below
Stone Bridge & just below
Lewis's house, we had
fine brest work's of some
6 feet across the top &
that on a high bluff.
we then crossed the hill
by Lewis's house, which
house had several cannon
balls through it, we
crossed the branch &
went over the hill
where Rickets Battery
(of Rhode Island) was
taken, at the house where
the old woman was
killed in. the house
was riddled in to atoms
& 50 yards this side Gen
Francis S Bartow of Ga
was killed. he died with
these words upon his
lips--They have killed me
boys, but never give up
the fight. The citizens of
[blank space left] placed an oblisk
on the spot he fell with
his dying words upon it.
A Gallant fellow it is
true. "To die for Liberty is a
pleasure and not a
pain." I saw many many
graves & nearly all of them
had three or four in each.
I saw mens bone's skull's
& even men in their
natural form lying on
the ground, with their
legs & body feet perfect
thy had just had a little
dirt put over them
& had since been rooted
up the skulls of men
were laying upon the
ground dead horses are
to be seen all over this
field just as they were
killed to[?] the cannon. a
horid sight it is even at
this late day demoralizing
Gen Bee fell near Bartow
& to the left of the house
Col. Fisher of N.C. was
killed. between this & the
house I cut a hickery
stick. for there was the
hotest fight of the
day. to the left of the
old house going from
Lewis's is where Kirby
Smith came up &
turned the tied of battle
I [?] the Ear of a horse,
& tryed to get a piece of
the stone of Bartow's
oblesk but could not. I
had to leave this field
with only a Kane & a
piece of horse ear as a
memento I saw many
visitors upon the field
there is not a day that
some one does not visit
the field. I saw 2 Mississpi
ans, with a pocket of
teeth. they had knocked
out of the skulls. this
was too inhuman for
me. I went to the "stone
Bridge" from here, which
was near a mile from
the old woman's house
where the hotest of the
battle was & but for
Kiry Smith we would
have been defeated.
around the Stone Bridge
was the largets Oak trees
I ever saw. the flat was
covered with these
trees, but had all
been felled the night
previous to the fight &
the road blockaded
I then came on home-
wards (To camp) along
the Pike until I reach
ed the house where the
Yankees made a hos-
pital, here I left the
Pike to avoid the Pick
et & soon found ourselves
in camp. Yet we feared
we would meet with
some difficulty in
passing the sentinal
on Cub run, but we
went between the one
we pass in the morning
& the Mill & avoid
him altogether we
then felt easy. on
the day of battle Lewis'
house was made a hos-
pital for the wounded
& the dying. on the
Battle of the 18th the
Yankee's fired into
a barn which we
had for a Hospital & which
had the hospital flag
waving on top. They
also made an attempt
to come upon us under
cover of the confederate
flag. how base they
were to stoop so low
who would accept victory
when gained upon such
Barbarous terms. they
commited acts that are
the blackest spots
upon the pagees of histo
ry they disregarded our
hospital flag, our
flag of truce & made
an attempt to come
upon us under our
own flag, which is
reckognized in all
nations as the lowest
of the low. to say the
least of them it would
be base flatery to
call them cowards.

MSS 4459